2025/5786 On the third night of Chanukah, I did not buy for you...

 I'm late! I have been caught up in the holiday frenzy, and while I may be behind in my posting, I have been busy not-buying for you nonetheless! 

ACTUAL PHOTO FROM NIGHT #3

On the third night of Chanukah, I considered not-buying a few more poo-related items- such as 

this lively game of Toilet Trouble- 

or perhaps this literary gem- 

But(t), these gifts truly should be not-given on Night #2.  Inappropriate for Night #3*.

Of course, The Christmas Poop Log** also has the distinction of belonging to the other December holiday, so we wouldn't want to give you this for Chanukah.

If we were going to go to the other holiday, instead of literature, how about philosophy? Specifically, this bit of philosophy:

PHILOSOPHY: Schrodinger's shirt

Philosophy? you query. But that's a shirt!!

Perhaps. But consider: 

We begin with the binary: Naughty/Nice

We add mystery and tension: I tried.

Did you try to be naughty?

Did you try to be nice?

Did you try to be trying?

Did you try? Really? Or are you just being cute?

What is "Nice"? What is "Naughty"?***

And could this become a Chanukah bit of philosophy, if we changed the colors to blue and white?****

I found this item at a gas station- er, excuse me, a rest stop that sells gas/ gives you gas (if you eat there). When did rest stops become the commercial hubs of the nation?

You can buy anything at the gas station- er, rest stop- for only 3 times the price as at a regular grocery store (check your Fritos (R) ).

Returning to the topic at hand: As intriguing as this bit of philosophy is, as exotic as the locale in which it was discovered, and in spite of the long standing Talmudic tradition of embracing both sides of the dialectic- in this case, Naughty vs. Nice- the garment remains firmly embedded in the non-Chanukah tradition, so it will remain non-bought.

*Some might say that these gifts are inappropriate on any night. One person's inappropriate is another's...propriate?

**This is an actual book about an actual Christmas tradition involving a log that "poops" out gifts after being beaten.

***'What is Naughty?" is a rhetorical question. Do not answer. This is a family blog. Much like Cards Against Humanity (R) family edition. Especially on Night #2.

****NO.