the real F word

While rehearsing Shakespeare in the park with my teen theater troupe, some of the moms approached me.

Could I speak to the teens about the appropriate use of language? Some of the foul mouthed vulgarisms- especially from some of the teen boys- especially around the younger kids- especially around some of the conservative moms- could I talk to the kids....?

So I thought about it. And this is the gist of what I said:

Language is powerful. Working with the beauty and the power of Shakespeare, I know this. You know that words can be beautiful and words can be ugly.

The words are beautiful and powerful and healing or hateful because of how we use them and what we understand from them.

It matters as much to whom we say it, as what words we use when we speak.

Here is one story.

When my kids were little, one of the families that we were friends with were conservative Christians, with strict standards of behavior. My daughter who was perhaps 10 at the time, reported this experience she witnessed while visiting. My daughter's friend J, also about 10, went running to her mom with a report about J's brother M.

J: Mom! Mom!

Mom: What?

J: Mom! M said a bad word!

Mom: What did he say?

J: He said the F word!

Mom: WHAT? What did he say???

J: I don't want to say it!

Mom: TELL ME!

J: He said (whispering) fart!

[Laughter from my teens]

So it depends who you are talking to. And I can tolerate a lot. I've heard the F bomb dropped- and I don't mean fart- and, depending on the time and place, it may not bother me at all.

But there are people here that it will bother. Have respect for them. Have respect for our organization. Don't say it.

There are words that offend me, though. There are. Here is the F word that I hate: faggot. I can barely say it.

I can't say the N word. You know the one I mean. If I had to say it in playing a role, it would be really difficult for me to say.

Words are powerful. Use them with care.