the weight is over

You know you are overweight when the weight that first drove you to seek out Weight Watchers now looks like a desirable goal weight.

I am so tired of being depressed and repulsed when I see pictures of myself.

I am also nervous about committing to a weight loss plan.

You see, I have gone to Weight Watchers- 3 times. Each time I lost the weight and met my goal weight-- in fact, the last time, I met my goal and stayed on it long enough to become a life-long member!-- and then, each time, I have gained it all back-- plus about 7 more pounds.

It's not just Weight Watchers. I've tried other plans too, with the same result: initial success, then gaining it back plus more.

I can't afford to gain it all back plus more this time.

I know people who have had liposuction, and gained it all back plus more. I know people who have had stomach surgery, who have gained it all back plus more. I know people who have lost a LOT of weight, medically supervised, and then gained it all back plus more.

This terrifies me.

I'm going to work a plan once again. I am trying to design a plan that will work FOR ME. FOREVER.

I am starting with a colon cleansing program that is also training me to drink 8 glasses of water a day.

I am starting a walk-30-minutes-every-day plan. This is difficult for me, as walking just to walk is a challenge. However, it is summertime now, and I am getting out and walking- with my pedometer, sometimes with my dog- every day. And I will acquire, before the inclement weather begins, a treadmill. I will.

I have also signed up for an online weight tracking chart and online waistline tracking chart.

Today I begin.