May 7

 Tuesday May 7 would have been Ken's 75th birthday, and it was tough, and honestly, it's just one milestone after another lately- it feels nonstop. 

Son AJ came to be with me for the week. He came in Monday night, taking the train to Ann Arbor (actually, he tried to take the train to Ann Arbor- Amtrak's direct route was interrupted and Amtrak put all the passengers on a bus in Battle Creek- why can't we have bullet trains like all the other countries?) and son JE and I and JE's family picked him up from the station. We all went out to dinner. AJ and I came home to my house.

The next day was Tuesday, Ken's birthday. My recent theme of "nothing goes according to plan but somehow we make do" continued. We (AJ and I, JE and his kids) had *planned* on going to a minor league game- the Toledo Mudhens, Ken's native Toledo and a farm team of Ken's beloved Tigers. There were thunderstorm predictions, and tornado warnings, and although we kept watching the weather, we made the wise decision not to go to the minor league game.

We all (the kids and I) did some different things. BI shared memories with her family at breakfast, ate some of Ken's favorite foods, had a run, took a sunset walk with a friend, had a Chivas nightcap with her spouse- not her favorite beverage, but Ken's. CM and KG went to a minor league game near where she is in South Carolina.

We all gathered on Zoom to share some favorite happier memories about Ken around lunchtime, as many were working. I mentioned the first birthday gift I gave him. One by one, the others shared some memories too. CM shared the last story, a hilarious reminiscence of Ken walking with her and talking, and talking so randomly- and letting loose a stream of farts that he had hoped his conversation would cover!

In Michigan, AJ and I cleared the cupboards of some of Ken's favorite foods that I don't care for and also stopped at the grocery store to buy some of Ken's other favorites- like licorice, that I don't like- and also some Hershey's kisses (because, hey, maybe the people at the food bank don't like licorice either) and then we brought the bags of goodies to a local food pantry. 

We drove by the school where Ken used to work, and took pictures of the tree that the school planted in his memory. It is in leaf now. We shared the pictures with the other kids.

AJ and I went out to the Coney Island restaurant that Ken liked for lunch, and I had what Ken always described as their "world famous homemade corned beef hash and eggs" and AJ had veggie hash- as close as a gluten free vegetarian could get. 

As JE's work day was winding up, AJ and I drove back to Ann Arbor. The rain had let up (although it was predicted to come back- and did, with a vengeance) so AJ, I, and all of JE's family went for a long walk around the neighborhood. When we came back to JE's house, we ordered pizza (gluten free for AJ) and had dinner together.

The storm raged all around us, but no tornadoes in Ann Arbor.

While we were having dinner, we traded some stories about Ken. AJ and JE were able to bond and reminisce about how Ken was not a good cook- at all. They both shared the horror of the memory of when Ken made them leftovers (combined): macaroni and cheese combined with tunafish heated in the microwave! JE's spouse JP laughed out loud for a while at that!

After dinner, we played a few different games all together.

It was a very typical family gathering that Ken would have loved.

AJ and I headed back home, and chatted through the hour long drive. 

The next day, AJ and I found time to go to Ken's (and my) favorite local ice cream shop.

We all had some tears and also some smiles and even laughter. It was good to touch base with each other.

Milestones still ahead- Mother's Day tomorrow, Father's Day next month, July 4th family gathering as well as my birthday, CM's, and EC's. August will be unveiling Ken's grave marker.

And then it will be September 9, a year.